32 Comments
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Suzy's avatar

Words do matter . Thanks for a wonderful read

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Fernanda Santos's avatar

From an "old person" to another, love this post.

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Paul von Zielbauer's avatar

Fernanda, you're definitely not old. Well, maybe on the internet you are. But not in person. Haha...

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Fernanda Santos's avatar

I feel (and look) better today than in my 40s. Must be all that black coffee I drink lol

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Paul von Zielbauer's avatar

Your sense of humor keeps you young, my dear. Or maybe it's my sense of humor. Either way, coffee helps, apparently.

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Marsha Robinson's avatar

I’ll vouch for ab roll-outs, they have been a regular part of my fitness for close to 20 years. They really are a great partial body workout. I tell people all the time to just start, I couldn’t do more than 2 my first time. Twice a week now, 30 each time, makes a huge difference in my core, 72 years young.

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Paul von Zielbauer's avatar

Marsha, that is an impressive level of consistency and dedication. Where do you feel it most, in your body?

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Marsha Robinson's avatar

Core, first and foremost, next would be shoulders and upper back. As we age, particularly for women, core strength is so important for balance.

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Paul von Zielbauer's avatar

It really is one of the simplest ways to build a lot of upper-body neuromuscular strength. And as you say, create a strong foundation for balance, which is a bigger predictor of aging with health than even grip strength.

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Jill Lottes's avatar

Harris absolutely needs to be held to this! Slippery slopes. Good call.

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Paul von Zielbauer's avatar

Jill, seems as if we live in a world of slippery slopes nowadays. The more we can pour some sand on, for better traction, the better. Thank you for reading and for adding your thoughts.

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Lorraine C. Ladish's avatar

I'm almost 62 and I'm starting to feel middle aged now lol. Based on how I live, work out and conduct myself it absolutely blows my mind that to young people I'm old lol. Great post.

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Paul von Zielbauer's avatar

Lorraine, I'm with you. It simply doesn't occur to me that I'm anything different than I was the previous day, week, year. Older — as an acknowledgement of time passing — doesn't mean old. So, if you've always had an "older but not old" mindset from, say age 35 or 40, there's no mechanism to start thinking of yourself as old. Until the internet punches you in the face.

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Lorraine C. Ladish's avatar

For reference I don’t think of my dad is old at 86. And it’s because of his mindset and the way he is in the world. I’ve interviewed women older than me for my website and other publications like NBC and Yahoo and they don’t seem old to me.

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Paul von Zielbauer's avatar

Which lends to the notion that age is a number that matters but doesn't, and shouldn't, dictate self-perception or public perception of one's age. (One of my friends told me today that the only reason that I got called old on the internet was because my hair is gray.) That said, ageism is rampant and real.

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Lorraine C. Ladish's avatar

That’s so true. My husband has grey hair (I still color mine but don’t have as much as he does) and was considered older as soon as that happened. My stepson’s friends would ask if he was the grandfather. And yes ageism is rampant for sure. Sometimes even amongst people of the same generation. And then there is internalized ageism too!

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Paul von Zielbauer's avatar

The internalized version of ageism is especially insidious. Good on your hubby for sticking with the natural gray. #grandpa -- ha ha.

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Victoria's avatar

I’m gonna be 60 this month. Aging is a privilege. I know too many people, including my husband and a couple of close friends, who didn’t live as long as I already have. “Old” is just an adjective.

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Paul von Zielbauer's avatar

I do believe Victoria just dropped the mic.

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Diana's avatar

When I was talking with a (younger) friend a few years ago, I referenced myself as middle aged. He laughed and said “You aren’t middle aged! Your son is middle aged!” Ooops! 😅

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Paul von Zielbauer's avatar

Diana, if you say you're middle aged, you're middle aged.

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Drew's avatar

Love the part about Harris.

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Paul von Zielbauer's avatar

Drew, I appreciate you reading. Curious: what strikes you about it? Seems that a lot of people have a lot of different thoughts about it. Always interesting to hear the ideas.

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Drew's avatar

I'm a 45 year old Scottish lawyer, doing my best not to get horribly out of shape. I found your content from an interest in fitness. I'm also a big fan of Sam Harris; through him and Joseph Goldstein I've become an "accidental" Buddhist. I like Dan Harris, came across his work via SH and JG. That said, my lawyerly mind and Buddhist sensibilities can't handle the lack of care in quoting something incorrectly. Details matter, particularly when you have a lot of influence. The internet is so polluted with rubbish, it's important to try and hold the line and maintain integrity. Otherwise everything becomes nonsense. It's particularly bad when it comes from someone who has been trained as a journalist!

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Paul von Zielbauer's avatar

Drew, thank you for describing what specifically bothers you about this. I concur: Dan Harris misquoting Thich Nhat Hanh is not acceptable, and that, as you say, the details matter; the internet is chock full of rubbish; maintaining integrity is an important obligation, especially for those of great influence.

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Hugh's avatar

ETHICS BE DAMNED??

don't think so;

rather: TRIAL BY FIRE, WHEN YOU FLY THE WEB

due diligence lurks

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Hugh's avatar

apologies for the labyrinth…admiration for your tenacity 🤙🏼

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Hugh's avatar

apologies for such an obtuse expression of AFFIRMATION! 👍🏻

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Paul von Zielbauer's avatar

I think I just needed a few days to process the obtuseness. I read it now and it makes immediate, complete sense.

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Paul von Zielbauer's avatar

Hugh, I can't tell if you like it or hate it. But I think you like it. Correct me if I'm wrong.

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Lee Larson's avatar

I wouldn't get so uptight about attributed quotes, these things happen all the time with the famous writers of the past across all the disciplines of human endeavor. Don't major in the minors...sheesh!

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Paul von Zielbauer's avatar

Lee, I appreciate you saying that. I spent a few weeks letting it sit, wondering if I'm making too big a deal out of it. But in the end I decided that it's sticking with me because of precisely what you said: people do this all the time, and it's not right. I understand other people will disagree, and that's OK. But for me,aging with strength means standing by your convictions. And speaking up for them.

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